THE NEW TRADITION of going to a Tampa contest and spending the week either before or afterwards in Miami is interesting, because you get to see the very best and very worst of the state Homer Simpson famously and accurately referred to as "America's Wang."

DESPITE THE ABUNDANCE of shiny-shirted New Jersey Guido playboy-types and over-cooked, top-heavy, would-be trophy wives, South Beach, Miami is actually really, really nice. It's as close as you can get to Europe or South America in the United States, and if you avert your eyes from the occasional yellow Hummer or Burger King, you can imagine yourself on the French Riviera, taking a dip in the gently rocking azure Mediterranean, half-cocked from a sixer of 1664s.

Of course, leave the beach area and you'll run smack dab into Florida--the real Florida--the sweaty, broke-down, Cheetos cheese stuck in the corners of your mouth Florida. It starts just over the bridge from South Beach and ends somewhere near Alabama.

SHUTTERBUGGERY

AN EXCITING NEW SUB-GENRE has emerged in the world of fine art photography, sure to vie for attention alongside the romantic idealism of Henri Cartier-Bresson, the painstakingly technical masterpieces of Ansel Adams, and the gritty realism of Larry Clark. It basically involves going out to bars at night, getting shit-faced loaded, and taking pictures of other drunk people with a point-and-shoot camera. Although the world is your canvas, popular subjects for this new art form include:

* YOUR SKINNY DRUNK FRIENDS

* YOUR ONE FAT DRUNK FRIEND

* PEOPLE GIVING YOU THE FINGER

* BUMS

* OLDER DRUNKS

* PEOPLE PASSED OUT

* PEOPLE BARFING

* BARF

* PEOPLE PEEING

* PECKERS

* BUTTS

* TITS

* PEOPLE FIGHTING OR WRESTLING

* PEOPLE MAKING OUT

* PEOPLE TAKING PICTURES

* PEOPLE TALKING ON CELL PHONES

* COMBINATIONS OF ANY OF THE ABOVE